No amount of dishwashing will clean up THIS MUCH BLOOD!

Developer: SKA

Buy: Xbox Live Marketplace

I don’t know why, but Xbox Live community games tend to attract some slightly concerning individuals. Case in point: Nathan Fouts, the gun-obsessed creator of the sublime shoot-em-up Weapon of Choice who made limb hacking programs for a living. However, Nathan’s got nothing on James Silva (head honcho of the indie developer Ska Games).

You see, according to all accounts, James used to work as a lowly, underpaid and overworked dishwasher…and hated every soul destroying moment of it. To pass the time, he fantasised about being an epic undying dishwasher samurai, using the tools of his trade (cutlery, natch) to defeat evil imaginary villains and bring his own brand of bloody justice to the impious (and, let’s face it, probably his employers). So far, so psychotic. Luckily, his fantasies didn’t cause him to snap and kill everyone in the restaurant- instead, he channelled his boredom and anger into a consistent vision and made a game out of it.

Dishwasher: Dead Samurai was originally designed a community game, but won the prestigious Dream Build Play competition and $10,000 worth of Microsoft funding. Now it’s a fully-fledged XBLA game ready to kick ass and take names on Xbox Live Marketplace. So, let’s pick up our cleavers and start chopping our way through it!

Dishwasher is a side-scrolling hack ‘n’ slash slaughterfest that focuses on split-second combos and ultraviolence. In many ways, it plays like a two dimensional Ninja Gaiden: you’ll slice and dice your way through hordes of varied enemies with an arsenal of upgradable weapons (more on that later), context-sensitive executions, aerial combos and buckets of blood. Much like Ninja Gaiden, the emphasis is on split second timing and choosing the right weapons for the job. Indiscriminate button mashing will result in swift, humiliating dismemberment. The combat mechanics are truly excellent: the controls are tight and responsive, combos are intuitive and varied (including an array of wall-based and aerial finishers) and a Devil May Cry-style dodge roll provides a quick way of getting out of trouble. You’ll have a lot of fun trying out different weapons and strategies on the cyborg hordes.

While we’re on the subject of weapons, the Shift Blade deserves a special mention. Most of the arsenal is fairly standard (meat cleavers, chainsaw, shotgun etc.), with the exception of the Katana that you’ll glean from the first boss. The Shift Blade acts like a fairly weak sword…except a push of the right stick teleports you several metres in any direction you choose. The combat applications are immense: you can teleport behind a group of enemies and bury your blades in their backs, juggle enemies dozens of metres into the air, materialise over an enemy and perform a brutal ground slam… the possibilities are endless. The arsenal is incredibly well-balanced, however- you’ll need everything at your disposal to stay alive.

Dishwasher is very stylistically striking, essentially looking like a psychotic Braid. The game is intentionally hideous- the backgrounds are watercolour masterpieces painted in shades of blood, rust, mud, steel and more blood. And then an entire extra vat of blood’s thrown over it for good measure. The violence is sickeningly, unflinchingly brutal- there’s nothing pretty about it. After all, there’s nothing beautiful about mass murder, and Dishwasher’s ugly style underlines how disgusting and horrific death can actually be. You’ll simultaneously laugh and feel slightly sick at the horrors you’ll unleash on your enemies; Christ, you’ll almost feel sorry for them.

However, Dishwasher’s graphical style cuts both ways. Some of the graphics (especially enemy sprites) are extremely raw, with a low resolution and jarring animations. They’ll strike you as insultingly unpolished, especially considering the $10,000 that could’ve been spent on tidying up the art direction. The sound design is equally unambitious- you’ll be hearing a lot of low quality stock phrases over the course of the game (you’ll be ready to go on your own bloody massacre after hearing the tac-team operative scream “fire in the hole” for the hundredth time!). Luckily, the darkly hilarious comic book panels and varied level design more than makes up for some of this.

There’s one more thing I need to tell you. This game is very, very difficult. No, I’m not a pussy, and no, this isn’t a complaint…but it is a warning. We’re talking Ninja Gaiden difficult- there’s no margin for error and a single misjudged combo or mistimed dodge roll will result in a restart. What’s more, the continue system is fairly punishing: after four deaths you’ll be forced to retry the level, losing your recent upgrades. If you’re in any doubt about your abilities then you should start on the easy difficulty setting, since you’ll keep your upgrades at the end of the game. Consider yourself officially warned.

But that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with a stern challenge, especially when Dishwasher delivers such a vast amount of content. You’ve got an expansive campaign, dozens of arcade arenas (that can be played in co-op for some of the most intense two player action available on the console) and even a bizarre cooperative mode that uses a guitar hero peripheral to control a floating, sharpened magic shredding iron. This mode doesn’t really work too well thanks to its simplistic nature- but fair play to James for trying! It’ll give you and a buddy a fair few minutes of surreal fun.

In summary, The Dishwasher: Dead Samurai will prove to be  massively divisive. Gamers looking for a casual lighthearted diversion will find themselves quickly beaten down by its grinding difficulty and gritty art style. However, if you’re looking for a skilful, brutal, bloodsoaked orgy of destruction you should definitely invest. 800 points will net you the equal of any number of full-price titles…for my money, the Dishwasher is more fun and polished than Ninja Gaiden 2! There’s a whole bunch of gory, disgusting content waiting for you here- pick it up and descend into madness.

Oh, and the moral of the story? If you’re in a crappy job you’ve got two options. Either go on a massive killing spree…or make a game and rake in the dough. With XNA, the choice is yours!

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